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Archive for August, 2009

21 Months Old

August 11, 2009 at 8:00 am · Filed under Uncategorized

Madeline Alice Spohr passed away on a Tuesday. She would have been 21 months old today.

She SHOULD have been 21 months old today.

A week after she passed, I took my girls to do a balloon release in her honor.

A lot of people who watched the video asked me which song I used.

The song I used was Robbie Williams “Nan’s Song”.

He wrote it for his beloved grandmother who passed, but there was no more of a fitting song to use for Madeline:

Nan’s Song/ Madeline’s Song:

You said when you’d die that you’d walk
with me everyday
And I’d start to cry and say please don’t talk that way
With the blink of an eye the lord came
and asked you to leave
You went to a better place but He stole you
away from me

And now she lives in heaven
But i know they let her out
To take care of me

There’s a strange kind of light
Caressing me tonight
Pray silence my fears she is near
Bringing heaven down here

I miss your love i miss your touch
But I’m feeling you everyday
And i can almost hear you say
“You’ve come along way baby”

And now you live in heaven
But i know they let you out
To take care of me

There’s a strange kind of light
In my bedroom tonight
Prayer silence my fears she is near
Bringing heaven down here

You taught me kings and queens
While stroking my hair
In my darkest hour I know you are there
Kneeling down beside me
Whispering my prayer

Yes there’s a strange kind of light
Caressing me tonight
Pray silence my fear
She is near
Bringing heaven down here

The next time that we meet
I will bow at her feet
And say wasn’t life sweet
Then we’ll prepare
To take heaven down there

We all Miss you little girl. Every one of us.

Kiss Me, I'm Irish by The Spohrs Are Multiplying....

Please click the Friends of Maddie link to to the right.

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Movie Monday

August 10, 2009 at 11:08 am · Filed under Movie Monday, My daughters

Sharing originally uploaded by gemini-girl.

Soleil (on the left) keeps saying “Da” to her sister. What she means is “Toda” in Hebrew which means “Thank you”.

Our parenting skills? Not too shabby!

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It’s like a car accident. You just can’t look away.

August 7, 2009 at 11:05 am · Filed under Me

I have always been a fan of the Television Arts.

More so than Movies.

I guess I like things that have chapters (except for books of course, because who has time to use their “imaginations”)

The only highlight of my 6 weeks of hospital bedrest was the 24 hour TV that I had access to. I had to pay, $6.00 a day- but it was well worth it. Sure, I didn’t get premium cable channels- but who could resist a full hour of “The Fresh Prince of Bell Air” on TBS while I ate my bland hospital food.

There are QUALITY programs that I love. For example, Lost is one of my favorite shows on TV. I may love it a little too much.

I watch Weeds, The Office, 30 Rock.

I also love mind- numbing useless shows.

The kind of shows that I have to be undercover about.

Example:

“Rock of Love”, “Real Chance at Love”, “I love Money”, “Charm School with Ricki Lake”, “More to Love”- I can go on (but you don’t want me to- trust me).

Apparently I like any show that has the word “Love” in it.

Usually, I don’t watch it in real time. It’s always there- waiting in my trusted DVR. I don’t know what I did before I got a DVR.

A DVR is like a meth addict having a meth lab in his kitchen.

My friend’s mom asked me how I have time to watch these shows. Valid question. Between my working full time, and being a mom to twin toddlers- I hardly have time to sweep the floors.

My favorite time of day is after we put the girls to bed. That is when I get to have dinner (in my bedroom- because why would I waste 20 minutes in a boring kitchen when I could be watching one of my shows?), and turn on the tube. Oh to eat my boring grilled vegetables while watching an Episode of “More to Love”.

“More to Love” is a dating show like “The Bachelor“, but with heavy people.

GENIUS.

A regular person dating show. Novel.

The “Bachelor” is 26 and let me just tell you- adorable. The women on the show are all in their 20′s and are curvy.

You gotta appreciate that.

The man on the show says that he LURRRVS curvaceous women (my kind of guy!). Most of these women have never been on a date before (so they tell the cameras).

The cant look away factor:

When they introduced the women: their age, height and weight flashed on the screen.

Wow.

A woman who can go on national television and reveal her weight? I tip my hat to those ladies.

But I just didn’t care for the fact that the producers felt it necessary to give us that information. I mean, we can already tell that these ladies are not the typical ” Bachelor” contestants.

Like I said- it’s a car accident that I cannot look away from.

The VH1 STD-Ridden shows are the BEST. They bring on women and men that look like they just came back from the tanning salon in Jersey. Brett Michaels is apparently STILL looking for Love. No Brett, you are searching for another venereal disease my friend. Though you are adorable - I would never touch you with a 10 foot pole.

”Real Chance at Love”, is about two brothers who are looking for “love”. The show is really just a way to promote their HORRIBLE band called the “Stallionare*s”. I mean, if they would have hit it big, they would have done so by now. Stop wasting my time with your tracks- my ears are bleeding.

Can’t look away factor:

On the first episode of the SECOND SEASON- a young lady goes around telling everyone that she has a “Grade- A Ass” – “You cant buy this kind of ass” she tells the camera.

And then she was given the nickname (as each person recieves a nickname on these reality shows).

Her nickname? “Junk” – as in “Junk in the trunk”

Your mother would be proud Ms. Junk.

Aside from the reality shows, I watch a little show called “The Secret Life of the American Teenager”

This is a classic example of a 10 car pile up.

The writing is HORRIBLE. If the actors had better material, they would sound decent. But because they don’t have anything good to work with, it sounds like they are reading off of flash cards.

The show is about a 15 year old girl who becomes pregnant at Band Camp right before she starts high school. She decides to keep the baby and raise it. Molly Ringwald plays her mother.

Cant look away factor:

The word sex is used in EVERY SINGLE SCENE. It’s a show that promotes abstinence- but is hidden behind BAD writing.

So just in case you were wondering what I do between 8pm-11pm (because I am a grandma and go to sleep at 11pm) – You can always find me watching the tube, killing my brain cells- one BAD show at a time.

what’s your guilty pleasure?

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Toddlers are the new Pre-Teens

August 6, 2009 at 8:18 am · Filed under Uncategorized

I needed to document this because it made us laugh to NO END last night.

We took the girls to the park after I came home from work (when I am half zombie-like anyway).

Neve was walking around the slides and swings, and I was trailing behind her. As we were set to leave, she refused to budge. I picked her up and she struggled.

Then the words came out.

The words I didn’t think I was going to hear until they were at LEAST pre-teens:

“Go Away”

My mouth dropped to the floor.

“Did she just say ‘go away’?” I asked my husband.

“Yes, yes she did.” he responded.

I wish the story ended there, but it didnt.

She then proceeded to bite me on the shoulder.

And that is how a 20 month old turns into a angst filled teenager.

Good night folks!

You just don't understand Mom!

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Wordless Wednesday

August 5, 2009 at 8:05 am · Filed under Uncategorized, Wordless Wednesday

December 20th, 2007:

Neve had been home from the NICU for about a week and a half. She was laying on her Daddy, giving us the Peace sign.

Peace Man

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My Father

August 4, 2009 at 10:59 am · Filed under Family

Just writing the words “My father” is setting off something inside of me.

My father is the man who raised me…

except, he didn’t actually raise me.

He provided for me.

That is all he did.

And is that really the same?

My father has always been a self- absorbed man.

The kind of man that you would think is too wrapped up in himself and his needs to have children.

Except he did.

My brother was born when my father was 36. He turned 40 a few months after I was born.

Except on my birth certificate it says he was 36. He lied about his age because he didn’t like getting older.

He lied on my birth certificate.

My mother was his THIRD marriage.

Apparently, the other two woman before her came to their senses and ran from him.

You know the kind of guys that you date when you’re younger that have no direction in life or plan?

That was, and is, my father.

My father traveled the world before he settled down with my mother. He lived in Denmark and spoke Dutch. He traveled across Europe with his brothers.

I think a part of him settled before he was ready.

He would always talk about his travels when we were kids, always complaining about living in NYC and how much he disliked it- but never did anything about it.

I was a Daddy’s girl when I was younger, always closer to my father than my mother. He would never berate me, or yell at me, or judge me…. or… parent me.

I only now realize that it wasn’t him being a good father, it was him not being a father.

He never took a day off of work to see my plays, or asked me about homework. He never fixed my hair, or changed a diaper. He never asked me how my day was, or inquired about what was bothering me.

He just didn’t.

He never hugged or kissed me.

Wait, that’s a lie.

He kissed me maybe once or twice- for no apparent reason. When I was 22 years old, he walked past me, hugged me, and kissed my head.

It took me aback.

I went into my room and started crying.

As a grandfather, he is much more warm than he was with my brother and I. He kisses the girls a lot and plays with them as much as he can. But he NEVER EVER buys them anything.

Not even a trinket.

That bothers me to no end- because it’s not about the superficial: It’s what it means. It’s the thought.

I am a VERY giving person. Some would say too giving. So I cant even comprehend being stingy to those you love.

I remember when I was a kid, my father took my brother and I to Six Flags (Amusement park). It was a lot of fun. As a 9 year old, I wanted a gift from the gift shop. He took us in, but refused to buy us anything (mind you, we were doing well at that time). Instead, he told us to gather next to all the stuffed animals, and he took a picture.

Yes, he did that.

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Or the time when we went to Disney World and he wouldn’t buy us anything.

I would NEVER do that to my kids. Ever.

And again, I know that it may just seem materialistic- but it’s not.

He could have just bought us something small and stupid- a key chain, a trinket.

But he chose not to.

He chose not to do a lot of things.

Until THIS DAY I do not have my high school year book. The year book I pretty much wrote myself. I was handed the yearbook on the graduation stage with my diploma, but it was promptly taken away a few moments later. Why you ask? Well, there was a tuition balance of about $500.00 and they wouldn’t give it to me until it was paid.

He still hasn’t paid. I still don’t have the year book.

IN MY LIFE I would never do that to my child. Embarrass them like that? Really? for $500? I would hook on the street to get that $500 if I had to.

He just didn’t care.

That seems to be a theme in his life.

He always manages to just get by.

I just don’t think that’s enough anymore.

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Celebs find me engaging

August 3, 2009 at 2:07 pm · Filed under Fun times, Uncategorized

I was given tickets by the AWESOME NYCitymama for the Food & Wine Festival that took place over the weekend in Atlantic City.

Atlantic City is about a 2- 2.5 hour drive from my home, but my husband and I made a day of it.

My mom agreed to watch the girls and off we went, like a couple of teenagers with no obligations. Ahh, to be young.

You can read all about my time at the event on NYCityMama ‘s blog (when she comes back from her road trip!)

But what I didn’t write about was my encounter with Duff from Ace of Cakes. He was wearing sunglasses (indoors) and of course I had to ask him if that was because he PAAArtied hard the night before. He laughed and said that he doesn’t party and that he is actually pretty boring.