Yesterday, I took the day off of work. This happened because I had a bad cold on Wednesday followed by a trip to my dentist for my first EVER root canal . Prior to having children, I NEVER had a cavity in my life. They say it has something to do with your pregnancy depleting your calcium levels.
I have had to have 2 fillings and 1 root canal since giving birth.
What I tweeted on wed night...
Oh yes, loads of fun.
So Thursday morning:
We decided to take a little trip to the Home Depot with kids in tow, to purchase a door for our kitchen. We need this to keep the little buggers out.
We’ve been using their double stroller as a kitchen barrier, but someone is getting a little crafty.
My husband was standing at the check out counter at the Home Depot with Soleil in the cart. I was standing to the side with a screaming Neve.
A woman was standing behind my husband on the check out line and says to the cashier “That woman really needs to get that baby out of here” — REFERRING TO ME AND NEVE.
My husband turns around and asks the woman , “Do you mean that woman over there with the baby?” – pointing to me again.
She said yes.
“Well you are referring to my wife and twin daughter. We will be out of here once we pay for our items.” he said.
The woman turned beat red and then mumbled something or other about how Soleil is so quiet compared to Neve. This woman then had the gall to try and make small talk with my husband by saying…
wait for it…………
“I guess she’s the good twin ” (referring to Soleil)
OMG.
That is THE WORST thing you can say to the parent of twins. THE WORST. Take note people.
It’s even worse than dressing twins alike ( in my opinion- don’t hate me chas).
I believe that just because 2, or 3, or 6 babies are born at the same time- does not mean that we should box them up into categories (all though I know it may be easier for those on the outside).
When I found out I was having twins of the same gender, I was a bit freaked out.
I, as a parent, want my children to be treated as individuals.
Individuals with different needs, desires, likes, dislikes, and passions.
And in ONE SECOND someone can come in and label them.
Just like that woman did.
When someone I know (like a co worker or such) asks me the same question, I always answer the same way :
“They each have their bad days- so there is no good ‘twin’ or bad ‘twin’.”
In our household (and with the people we come in contact with)- we always encourage no labeling.
So yes, Neve may have a shorter fuse, and Soleil may be a bit more physically adventurous, but that doesn’t mean we go around labeling them.
They are JUST as different as two siblings born at different times.
They just happen to be born at the same time…
poobou said
What a stupid woman. It’s funny, now that I have a kid, whenever I see one having a meltdown in public, my instinct is not to be irritated, but to say, “Oh thank God that’s not me this time.” Because I can almost guarantee that next time, it will be me.
Btw, after Catie was born, I had to get 6 fillings. SIX. And I floss every single damn day! No fair. (Sorry about the root canal, though, I’ve heard they’re awful.)
eden said
Oh my goodness … I am SO GLAD your hubbie said something to her! Yay him! Can not believe she said that. I’m going to ask my sisters if they ever got asked that when they were younger.
And, guess what Dave and I have been discussing? Both of us coming to New York next year, staying a few weeks when BlogHer is on. OMG. I’m going to book tix soon, keep saying “I have a friend in NYC” (you). No kids, just us. SO hopefully the plane won’t crash and leave our kids orphans
KJ and the Kids said
Way to go HUBBIE !
To me what’s just as bad is when people pick favorites. He’s my favorite or which one is your favorite. They will ask Syd…who’s your favorite. I always jump in with…she loves them both. although now she will try and answer which one is her favorite and why. ugh.
Megan Gregory said
that must be annoying – good of hubby to speak up. I think you are doing a great job focusing on allowing them to be who they are – I can’t imagine calling one kid good vs bad, just awful. and sorry to hear about the teeth – that doesn’t sound fun at all!
Jennifer said
I get that ALL the time. “She’s the quiet one” or “She’s the outgoing one, right?” How bout you take out “one” and just say She is quiet or she is outgoing. I can handle that. I struggle at times with this bec. I do it too. But they are two girls (mine) with VERY different personalities and appearances and paths.
Amanda (aka Baby A) said
OMG Alison and I get that question still. It will never end!
Sometimes, when I’m nice, I say, “It depends. I think I am the bad twin because my sister is so awesome.” Other times I say “There’s no such thing” (said with a withering look).
That question is right up there with “Who’s smarter?” Like really?? Come on now!
Sugar & Ice said
Dude, we’re already getting the twin comparisons like crazy, and I feel like correcting people all the time. I get “That one is the more outgoing, adventurous, quieter, louder, calm, more talkative, etc.” Not only do I get personality comparisons, but we also get physical comparisons…”That one is blonder, more tan, paler, longer, shorter, heavier, lighter, has bluer eyes, etc.” At least they can’t compare their clothes, b/c those are the same! At least they won’t be able to blame me later for always putting one or the other in the cute clothes, right?? Haha, that was just a joke for your benefit
, nine days out of ten they do not wear matching outfits. Most days they have totally different outfits with a coordinating outfit thrown in once in a while, and on a special occasion I pull out the matchy stuff…WHICH i LOVE! I can’t lie! Even Lila wants to join in on the matchy match outfits. I promise…when they are old enough to pick their own clothes, they can wear whatever they choose….then they can only blame themselves if one ends up looking cuter 
.
By the way, this is a side note that reminded me of that picture you posted once of those adult twins dressed alike that you saw on the street. I was at the doctor’s office having blood drawn and in walks these two women that kind of looked alike and were dressed exactly the same from their earrings down to their shoes. They were older…definitely senior citizens, and I sat staring at them trying to figure out their deal, assuming they were twins and thinking it was a little strange that they’d do something like that…something that seems like a cry for attention when being done by someone that age. Anyway, I saw them in the elevator later and asked if they were twins, and come to find out, they weren’t twins, actually have an 8 year age difference….just sisters who like dressing alike…can you even imagine??
geminigirl64 said
OMG!! What a crazy story!
The women that I saw that were dressed alike were also senior citizens, and when I walked by with my double stroller, they looked at the girls amd said “Twins?” “We’re also twins” – duh.
And you know how much i love you and please dont hate me when I say that i wouldnt dress my girls alike. My husband and his brother were 1.5 yrs a part and their mom would sometimes dress them alike and he HATED it.