Archive for May, 2009

Joyous & Uneasy

So this post might be a bit controversial.

I don’t usually do “controversial”.

I was on a social networking site this morning and saw that a friend of mine from elementary school just had a baby.

I am over the moon for her, I really, truly am.

My former classmate is disabled.

Not just in the physical sense, but a bit in the mental sense as well. 

She always had a sunny disposition, always smiling and laughing- despite her disabilities.

I remember being in the 4th grade and going to the bathroom. She was sitting on a bench adjusting her prosthetic leg. That was a huge shock to see as a 9 year old, but as she spoke to me, I just ignored it and continuedin my conversation with her. I never wanted her to feel like a side show.

We never asked her what was wrong with her. I mean, up until that point I didnt even know she had a prosthetic leg. All I knew was that she walked with a limp.

She was different and we all knew it- but we NEVER EVER made her feel badly about it. I always got picked on because of my hair (or “man hands”) but no one ever poked fun at a disability.

When we graduated elementery school, I never heard from her again. We all went to different private high schools.

Then, out of the blue a few months ago, I got a friend request from her.

I was so happy to hear from her. She was always such a sweet, amazing person.

Turns out, she was married to someone disabled as well (mentally) and was pregnant.

She just had a baby.

So now, not trying to tread into uncomfortable territories here, but the thought of this gets me wondering.

Most likely this child, and any other child they may have in the future- might be disabled as well.

And I’m not talking about the physical sense, more of the mentally disabled sense.

Of course, I could be wrong and that child will be 100% OK both physically and mentally- I pray he will be.

But the thought has made me just a bit uneasy. I mean, knowingly bringing a child into this world that may have some major disabilities might be a bit selfish (again, just one mans opinion).

And no, I’m not talking about a pregnancy gone wrong- or a child being born disabled.

I am talking about knowingly becoming pregnant with a child that will most likely have a disability.

But on the other side of the coin, just because they are disabled, does that mean that they don’t deserve to know the joy of having a child?

I told you this was uncomfortable territory.

What do you think?

Comments (8)

What I Believe

I believe that a good slice of pizza is worth the zillion calories.

I believe that you should kiss  your children against their will (even if they scream and cry to get away).

I believe that every woman should treat herself to a manicure/pedicure at least once a month.

I believe that you should ALWAYS give up your seat to the pregnant/elderly.

I believe that you should never open someone’s refrigerator unless you ask first.

I believe that you should ALWAYS eat your sandwich bun with the seeds facing upwards (bec if you don’t, you’re eating your sandwich upside down people!)

I believe that you can meet/ make some of your best friends via the internet (blogs).

I believe that no matter how badly you think your life is, you wouldn’t trade it for the world.

I believe that you should go to the beach and get in the water, even if you don’t like to wear a bathing suit.

I believe that no one should be a helicopter parent.

I believe in buying expensive makeup because it goes on YOUR FACE and lasts longer.

I believe that you should never regret anything you have done in life (even if that includes the tramp stamp you got when you were 20..ahem)

I believe in remembering birthdays, because it makes someone feel special when you do.

I believe that it is never too late to go back to school.

I believe in wearing spanx.

I believe that every woman can look amazing- no matter what size or shape.

I believe that you never stop loving your “first love” (even if he did leave you when he thought you were pregnant.. ahem)

I believe that you can forgive, but never forget.

I believe that just because you were born to her, doesn’t mean you have to like your mother.

I believe that every marriage has it’s ups and downs.

I believe that every woman is a princess on her wedding day (no matter if the bride’s cousin tried to punch her out for kicking him out of her wedding- ahem)

I believe that there is always room on the credit card for an iced coffee.

I believe that sometimes life just ISN’T FAIR

My Maddie by The Spohrs Are Multiplying....

I believe that sometimes you just need a weekend away- alone.

I believe that just because you had: problems conceiving/difficult pregnancy/premature birth/ doesnt mean that you dont want to run away form your children at times.

I believe that you cant go wrong with avocado.

I believe that presents should be wrapped nicely.

I believe that facebook can be wonderful to reconnect with loved ones- if used wisely.

I believe that as an adult,  Disney World can be way more magical.

I believe that I will never find my second shoe.

 

I believe that there is a bigger picture, even if we can’t see it clearly.

What do you believe in?

Comments (6)

Just a Typical Wednesday Night

People, I am tired and too old for this shiz.

Last night I was out. Out until 3:30AM. I am way too old and too tired to be hobnobbing with celebrities:

T-Pain by you.

T-Pain

 

Don’t be fooled by my appearance, all I truly wanted was to be curled in bed with my hot cup of tea, not my vodka tonic with crazy straw:

Upfront by you.

The crazy straw went to my brain

All I wanted to do was scream at my husband for smoking in the house, in the bathroom, NOT ACTUALLY BE the one smoking a cigarette:

Fake smoking by you.

Bad influence

All I wanted to do on my Wednesday night was to watch my DVR’d episode of the  hysterical ‘Real Housewives of New Jersey’- not actually be laughing at my zany co-worker (who too is a  housewife- grasping, aren’t I?):
Upfront by you.
Anywho peeps, I am turning 28 in two weeks (which technically makes me 27) which means that I shouldnt be more Golden Girl than Gossip Girl- but I am SO the former.
I mean, how will I feel at 38, 48, 58- if all I want to do is lay in my bed and eat these?:

(Terra Freaking Chips- AWESOME to the second power)

Instead I ate these last night:

n704364784_1638709_6573686

 

 

And no- my husband’s name is NOT Carl!

Comments (11)

Park Fun

Park Fun by you.

 

Park Fun by you.Park Fun by you.Park Fun by you.

 

Park Fun by you.

Park Fun by you.

Park Fun by you.Park Fun by you.

 

********************************************************************

My See Kai Run contest is now over!

Congrats Amy! An email is coming your way!

 

xoxo,

Gemini Girl

Comments (3)

I’m a secret Nerd

So this post is about my favorite show LOST.

I believe this is yours

My brother, who is now my NEIGHBOR, decided to throw a Lost Party.

To him, this included inviting three friends over and purchasing some baked tortilla chips and salsa.

Oh, and Fudgy the Whale..

 

Funny Story/ Side note:

Since my brother has moved into his first apt at the age of 31, he has decided to start buying… wait for it…. ICE CREAM BIRTHDAY CAKES… every week, you know.. as a snack. And no, he doesn’t weigh 400 lbs (lucky freaking bastard- i eat a carrot and gain weight). So my brother is at the register at Carvel, and the cashier goes to open the cake. My brother looks at the dude like “Dude, why are you opening my cake” and then realizes. He then says to the guy “No need for any writing on it“- the guy looked at him like he was crazy.. he may not have been off target.

Anyway, back to the Lost Party…..

So this party plan sounded LAME-O to me, since it was the SEASON FINALE and it was a two hour episode and all.

I decided to just be a BIT more creative. I printed out som Dharma labels and did this:

 

IMG_1975

I totally printed out Dharma labels for chocolate bars

IMG_1974

My bro in his Dharma shirt

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No- not Daniel!

IMG_1973

You are entering the NERD Zone

 

 

I am not a big sci fi fan. But you just kind of get sucked into Lost.

(I mean, how could you NOT- YUM Sawyer)

Besides for the fact that my brother didn’t offer any Fudgy the Whale to his guests, or any of the cake that his guests brought for him (which I had to do.. he didnt quite get the whole ‘cut and serve the cake that the guest bring’ is good hostessing).. I ramble..

 

Anywho, The season offered a lot of explanations, but now I am EVEN MORE confused than ever. I mean, is John Locke, John Locke? Or is he a fake? Who is Jacob and why didn’t he care that he was going to die? And how is it that he died so quickly after he has been around since the beginning of time?

Dude.. my brain hoits.

All I can say is.. Bring  on the LAST SEASON..

Which sadly is in 9 MONTHS.. Just enough time for a baby to be conceieved and born.

Damn you Lost writers *shakes fists at the sky*

Comments (4)

See Kai Run

Let me tell you about a little company that I love called See Kai Run

A month or two back I was on a sample sale website  (which I love- if you would like to be invited by me, let me know) and purchased two pairs of shoes for my girls. I had purchased shoes prior to this, but they were never ones that my girls felt comfortable in. Either the shoes were too heavy, or the straps too tight.

I looked at the See Kai Run website and after reading the below statement I knew I had to buy them:

“See Kai Run and Smaller promote healthy development of babies’ and children’s feet with their ultra-flexible soles, soft leather and wide toe box. Our footwear meets the American Podiatric MedicalAssociation’s rigorous standards for foot health and functionality and has been awarded the APMA’s prestigious Seal of Acceptance.   

http://www.apma.org/MainMenu/RecommendedProducts.aspx 

What I love even more about them is the back storyof the company. A mom, looking for comfortable/ fashionable/affordable  shoes for her son decided to start up her own business after not being able to find a good pair of shoes:

“In 2002 I gave birth to a little boy named Kai. Two years later, I gave birth to a company called See Kai Run. See Kai Run was inspired by the need for comfortable shoes with flexible soles for my little Kai to wear outdoors. I wanted to create a line of shoes that was as happening as Kai – bold, hip, fun, with an urban sensibility. Something entirely different than what was offered.”

 

 

Why See Kai Run?

Healthy Fit

  • Very flexible soles are healthy for developing feet.
  • Wide opening and toe box accommodate even the chubbiest little feet.
  • Velcro closure allows for adjustable fit and easy on and off.
  • Leather lining is breathable and durable.
  • Padded collar adds comfort and helps our shoes stay on little feet.

Quality Construction

  • Leather used for our footwear meets the most stringent available U.S. and international guidelines.
  • Sheepskin leather uppers are butter-soft and more durable by weight than cow leather used by many other brands.
  • Durable construction and rubber sole stand up to heavy play indoors and out.

Urban Style

  • Hip, urban styles in modern color palettes.
  • Bold designs and detailing.
  • Modern takes on classic styles.

 

The shoes are a BIG HIT in my house. The girls always want us to put the shoes on them- they grab a shoe and hand it to us.

IMG_1551 by you.

 

IMG_1534 by you.

IMG_1557 by you.

They even love to chew on them

Roaming the halls by you.

The shoes in action!

I'm getting in the elevator by you.

I'm going to walk this way

I'm going this way now by you.

And I'm going to walk this way

 

They walk around in the See Kai Run shoes as if they are floating on air. The shoe itself is very soft and the soles are flexible- and they come in many beautiful designs (unlike other first shoe companies- I’m talking to you Str*de Rite!)

So because I TRULY LOVE this shoe company, I decided to contact them and ask if they would be interested in giving a free pair of shoes away to one lucky blog reader! They agreed- and now, one of you has the chance to win an AWESOME pair of shoes for your kid.

 See Kai Run has three different lines:

1) Smaller (0- 18months)

2) See Kai Run (6months- 3 years)

3) Eleven (not available in this giveaway) (3yo- 8yo)

 

All you have to do to enter is:

1)  Go to their website :  http://www.seekairun.com/index.html

2) Look at the style of shoe you are interested in

3) Post in the comment section which shoe style and size you would like to have if you won

4) If you choose, sign up for their email list- which btw, you wont regret, since their shoes andsizes tend to go- REALLY FAST. To sign up, all you have to do is go to their home page, and on the bottom where is says,  “Join our email list”- just type in your email address.

I will choose a winner at random. Contest ends on Friday, May 22nd at 8:00pm EST.

Believe me- as a mother of twins, I would NOT be supporting a company that I truly didn’t LOVE.

Good Luck!

:)

Comments (23)

Mother’s Day Madness

You KNOW you’ve had a bad weekend when you are glad to be at work.

It’s Monday morning and I  am trying to piece together a post to let you all know just what a HORRIBLE mother’s day I truly had.

So, as I’ve mentioned before, my husband hates celebrating any event. For example, when my birthday rolls around he tells me to “go buy something pretty”. Never does he get me a card.

On our anniversary, he doesn’t say anything to me, unless I remind him.

Forget about Valentines Day.

So what would make Mother’s day any different?

I had a LONG discussion with him about this behavior and he said he would change.

On Saturday, I was getting the girls dressed and was about to take a walk with them and my mother, to the park. The only reason my mother was with me on Saturday was because her best friend was out of state. She NEVER asks to spend time with me. I guess, for good reason.

So I called my husband up and told him that I was going to the bank. We had some money at home that we needed to deposit- lest our rent check bounce. He kind of gave me a vague answer- which led me to yell and say

“ just tell me where is it Damn it!”

I guess he disliked that, as he hung up on me and refused to answer my calls for the rest of the afternoon.

Then I took a walk with my mom and the girls to the park. It’s pretty far away and in my opinion any time spent with my mother for more than 15 minutes is a punishment.

Of course, my mother doesn’t believe in discipline. When she watches the girls she lets them behave however they want. She feeds them to NO END. I purchased a box of cookies last week (Gerber’s banana cookies) and they were gone in a day and a half. REALLY? Do they really need to eat so many cookies just because they want to? Where is your freaking backbone? That’s why I would eat an entire bag of Doritos as a kid- (mid size) she NEVER SAID NO. EVER.

And then a gem came out of her mouth. She said that she thought that my husband wasn’tbeing smart that he was going to college. That he should be working to support our family, because even people with master’s degrees get laid off.

Wow mom- you are one intellegent woman!

Sometimes I wonder where I come from.

It’s definitely not from her. 

Anyway, she doesn’t think that I am doing a good job as a mother. She tells me that they don’t need discipline yet, which I HIGHLY DISAGREE with.

Needless to say, we were bickering the entire time- not something I want to do in front of the girls, but not much I can do about it because there is just something horrible this woman brings out in me. I hate myself when I’m with her.

That night, as my husband was studying for finals, I went to dinner and a movie with my Brother. My mother called before we left and asked my brother if she could join us. My brother wasn’t in the mood to be angry that night- as my brother and I CANNOT talk to her without blowing up. I guess she brings that out in my brother too. He told her not that night, and apparently she became VERY UPSET.

The truth is, I had just spent the afternoon with her fighting, and I too was IN NO MOOD for her.

Anyway, Sunday rolls around and my husband told me not to expect anything for mother’s day as he was still upset with me from the day before. Of course, I know that he is looking for ANY EXCUSE to not celebrate anything for me.

My father calls and tells me he wants to treat me and my mother and the girls to lunch (as my husband stayed home studying for finals).

I knew I should have said no. I knew it.

But I also knew no one would be celebrating Mother’s Day for me at home-so I decided to go.

We drove to Manhattan and found a restaurant spot. The girls were making a mess, and then at a certain point they started yelling, screaming and screeching. EVERY EYE ON THAT PLACE WAS ON ME.

I didn’t know what to do.

I started sweating and became angry- so I put them girls in their stroller and left (the bill was about to come anyway). So I storm out, because I mean- what else am I supposed to do?

Once my parents came outside, my mom says that she wants to stroll the markets. By that point it was 5 pm and my girls were in no mood. So I told her that I needed to leave.

She wasn’t happy about it, and the was bitching the ENTIRE RIDE HOME.  Just yelling, and being not nice. She LOVES PLAYING THE VICTIM.Every time she would raise her voice- Neve would screech. It was torture.

 She then brought up the fact that my brother didn’t invite her the night before and said that we are ungrateful and rude.

Hmm… maybe there’s a reason that BOTH of your children CANNOT stand you?

After the car ride from hell, when my dad was getting the stroller out of the car, my mother opened her car door- proceeded to fling the diaper bag to the pavement and closed the door.

My dad was in shock.

I then took my doggybag, with the food I didn’t get to eat and flung it in her general direction. I told her that was no way for a grandmother to act, that I cannot stand her, that there is a reason that BOTH her kids don’t like her, and that I may love her because she is my mother but that I DO NOT LIKE HER AS A PERSON.

She just shook her head.

That was MY Mother’s DAY.

The truth is, I really cannot wait for the girls to start daycare- that way she doesn’t have to be a part of our lives anymore. She is an unhealthy human being and she brings out the worst in me.

I am not saying she is not a good grandmother, because she is. She just is NOT a good mother.

I really wish I had a good relationship with her, I do.

I just know that it wont happen.

 

Hope you all had a better Mother’s Day than I did!

:)

Comments (10)

Yeah, I got time to kill.

7 Things I Want To Do Before I Die:

1. Travel the world

2. Go to culinary school

 

3. See my cartoon become a series on tv

4. Have a job that I love and get paid well for it.

5.  Not have to worry about money.

6. Get laser hair removal- dont hate.

7. Become a grandmother.

 

7 Things I Cannot Do:

1. Play a sport well.

2. Knit. I tried while on hospital bed rest for weeks. My brain just does not get it.

 3. Say no to a slice of pizza (never met one I didnt like)

 

4. Rollerblade (I can hardly walk in a straight line)

5. Sit down with my mother for more than 30 minutes without arguing.

6. Add

7. Spell

 

7 Things That Attract Me to the Opposite Sex:

1.  Loyalty

2. Intelligence

3. Sense of humor- with a quick response time.

4. Someone who can fix and build things….

5. and not be afraid to braid his daughter’s hair.

6. Ambition

7. Confidence

 

7 Things I Say Most Often:

1. FYI

2.  I am sooo tired.

3. Hungry Hungry Hippo (aka I am so hungry)

 4. Come to mommy (when speaking to my daughters, of course)

5. There was a good reason I spent that money

6. Where are my shoes!?

7. I need a new job

 

7 Celebrity Crushes:

1.Gary Barlow (just because it has been 15 years since I crushed on him)

2. Gale Harold

3. Michael Buble’

4. Eddie Cibrian (swoon)

5. Can I say a hot guy at work.. oh no, wait, it has to not be IRL”

6. David Beckham

7. Neil Patrick Harris (yes, I know he bats for the other team but who cares)

 

 

 

Comments (1)

My Sunshine Girl

When I was 19 years old and determined to become an actress (snort), I decided that my last name would not cut it. It was too “ethnic” and hard to pronounce. I was looking for a really cool stage name.

I was sitting in my best friend’s car and the name Soleil popped into my head out of nowhere. ‘Maya Soleil’ would be a perfect stage name I thought to myself.  I gravitated toward Soleil ( which means sun in french).

Since as we all know that I am not a big time Hollywood actress (yet!)… I never used that stage name, but I did always keep the name Soleil in my mind.

I said that if I were to ever have a daughter, that would be her name.

Most of my friends thought I was crazy when at 19, I professed that Soleil would be my daughters name.

But I knew.

When I was pregnant with twins, I secretly hoped that one of them would be a girl.. if not both. Soleil needed to be named.

My husband hated the name. He was not having it. Plus, if you substitute the L with an N, it means hate in Hebrew (pronounced Sonay). I didn’t care. I told him he could name the other twin, but Soleil was going to be my daughter’s name. Needless to say, he didnt name Neve.

People often asked me how I knew which twin would be named what. I just knew. I knew my second born would be Soleil.

She came into this world, as Baby B and was the bigger of the two weighing in at a whopping 3.10 pounds. Yes- 3.10lbs.

Even though she was the larger baby, she had the most health problems right off the bat. She needed to be incubated, she would often stop breathing during feedings in the NICU, she had a hole in the valve of her heart that took longer to clear, she had ROP in her right eye, she stayed in the NICU two weeks longer than her older sister (6 Full weeks).

When they were born I called my mothers cousin in Israel (who is a HUGE Rabbi) and gave him the names I was to give to my girls. They have a process of taking the child’s name and their mothers name and getting a number from that. That number leads them to a certain passage in the Zohar and it tells them what kind of life that child will have if they were to be given that name.

Sometimes my cousin will tell people that the child’s name is not good for them, and often times sick children need to have their names changed (or add a name) in order to improve their health (MANY documented cases that I know of). Neve was given a check plus, but the name Soleil wasn’t. He said I could name her Soleil, but would need to change the spelling in Hebrew.

He said that the name would give her a rough start in life, but would be ok once she was out of the woods.

I contemplated changing her name… but couldn’t.

I knew that she was Soleil.

Soleil was a super colicky baby. She ALWAYS cried.

Aunt Jemima

*Or maybe she was just pissed off by the hats we put on her?*

I didn’t know it then, but she was just really gassy! Nothing that I could do would soothe her.

Nothing.

She just needed to be held extra long and physically and mentally I just couldn’t do it. It was two babies to one mommy.

My husband would often walk around with her- up and down the hallway- to calm her. It did. I believe that this is what solidified their bond since she LOVES and ADORE him. He is her EVERYTHING.

We thought for sure she would be our outspoken twin, and Neve would be the quiet one. Boy did that change when her stomach calmed down.

Soleil is my sunshine girl, always smiling always calm. She soothes herself by sucking her thumb.

JUST.LIKE.HER.MOTHER.

(I totally sucked my thumb from birth to 7 years old. I totally get it)

Sometimes I look at her and her resemblance to me freaks me out. I mean, side by side- this girl looks 95% like I did at her age.

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Soleil

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Me

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Me

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I just had a bigger head.

And even though Soleil is more attached to her daddy than me, I’m OK with that. I know that she loves me and knows that I’m her mommy. When I go to work and she sees my shoes on the floor- she points to them and says “Mama”.

When she sees other children she goes up to them and tries to hug and kiss them (even though she may get the occasional slap to the head by her sister for doing so)

IMG_1781 by you.

She loves Elmo and Sesame Street and every time the Sesame Street Theme song comes on (or any other song for that matter) she starts dancing.

Oh you. by you.

I always knew I wanted to name my daughter Soleil and that it was a special name.

What I never knew was just how special my little sunshine girl would be.

Comments (5)

I make my husband want to flee

Last Friday, a co-worker told me that she was 3 months pregnant. Now, for an IF (infertile) this news always gets to you – even if you have 27 kids.

This one hit me hard.

This co-worker and I were pregnancy buddies- as in, we were pregnant together the first time around.

It’s not like I’m not happy for her- I mean her son should have a playmate.. it’s just an issue inside of me.

When you have had IVF and produced a child from it, you always feel a sense of urgency to produce more children in case you just “cant anymore”.

I often wonder how I would feel about the spacing out of my kids if I weren’t an IF. I guess I’ll never know.

Once she told me, I had this sudden URGE to get pregnant again. Crazy, I know.

I mean- I’m finally getting to a place where our schedules are normal. My girls are sleeping, they are going to daycare soon, and it’s two babies to two parents. We’re finally getting the hang of this parenting thing.

So I called my husband and told him that I may want another baby now. He laughed in my face.

Ha.

The thing is, I don’t want to have to undergo the full procedure of IVF again. That’s pumping major chemicals into your body. If I can avoid it,  I will.

I already have 6 frozen embryos in the freezer.. all I would need to do this time around is get a trigger shot, wait 5 days, and have the defrosted eggs placed inside (that is if they survive the thawing process).

It could be that simple.

My husband says its a bad idea- I mean, we are just now starting to get a handle on it all- work, kids, school… and having another child would complicate the situation now.

I then proceeded to tell him I didn’t technically NEED him this time around (ah- science!)… I could do it without him. He laughed, said I was right- and then threatened to run away from us all.

We want more kids- 4 kids has always been our magic number.

I called the clinic and talked to them a bit. They said that they could implant just 1 inside, as my track record with twin  pregnancies aren’t great.

I cant imagine being pregnant with twins again. I don’t think I could handle the hospital bedrest, NICU, first few months of twins again. That is a once in a lifetime experience and thanks, but no thanks.

I was all gung-ho about making an appointment to sit down with the ivf doctor, when I got my blood work back from my internist.

I have been feeling run down and exhausted for a while now and thought maybe I was anemic. Turns out, I have almost no vitamin D left in my body. I don’t know too much about that stuff, so she explained to me that on average- 50 units is a normal number in your blood for vitamin D in your body. 

I have  6.

A 6.

How am I still walking around?

My Doctor said she had never seen a  number so low, and it was probably from having twins-  pregnancy  (esp a twin one!) sucks all the vitamins and minerals from your body. Having a number like this can cause you to be constantly exhausted- which I ALWAYS am- and make your metabolism slow down. Hmm..

She prescribed a  MAJOR supplement and then proceeded to tell me that I need to lose about 11 pounds to have a normal BMI. I wasn’t offended by that, because funny enough, I need to lose about 15 pounds to get to where I was pre- pregnancy. So I have decided to take the weight loss seriously and lose the rest now.

So getting my vitamin D number up , and losing the weight are my goals in order to become pregnant again. I want to be the healthiest I can be to carry another child.

It might take a few months, but I’m thinking I will try ivf again within a year or so. I know, it might be REALLY bad timing… but the urgency will never escape me as a lifelong IF.

 

Now if you’ll excuse me… I need to go get my tan on.

 

*NOT ME*

Comments (7)

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