Archive for August, 2007

More Ramblings from a Crazy Pregnant Chick

August 30, 2007 at 3:03 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

I seem to think my life is pretty boring- so why do you guys keep coming back for more?

SO a few things:

1. My doctor must think I’m crazy and annoying. I never meant to be one of those patients, but turns out I am. You see I can go for weeks without calling him, but then one day I can call 4-5 times.

I started taking Zan.tac on Monday and let me tell you- it’s a G-D send. No heartburn! No indigestion! I found my miracle drug. I only took zan.tac on my doctor’s recommendation so I knew it was ok for the babies.

Tuesday and Wednesday I found myself with too much time on my hands surfing different pregnancy websites. They can be helpful and can scare the sh*t out of me as well. Everyone claims that they have felt their babies at 16, 17, 18 weeks. Meanwhile me at 20 weeks, not so much. And considering I am having two, this lack of movement scares me! So keep in mind, I am worried to begin with.

Moving on…..

So I realize that I have had no appetite at all the past 2-3 days. This is strange for me since I am eating for 3 and am hungry ALL the time. I googled zan.tac side effects and it says to consult your doctor if you have loss of appetite. That was it. I started to panic- had I harmed them in there? They have no choice to eat what I eat and ingest what I ingest. I must say, I was scared to death.

After a few phone calls, the doctor calls me back:

Doctor Amazing: (I call him this because he really is the sweetest, patient, sarcastic, caring doctor ever): “Hey , what’s wrong?”
Me: “Well, I was told by the other doctor at your practice that I can take zan.tac, and I have been for three days. But I soon realized that I had no appetite, and the directions say that if you experience this consult your doctor”

Doctor Amazing: “No, it’s fine. You can take it every day if you want. You are feeling less hungry because the zan.tac is stopping the acid in your stomach. The acid is what makes you feel hungry all the time.”

Me : “Oh- I was just worried you know, since I’m pregnant”
Doctor Amazing: “You are?” (being sarcastic but adorable)
Me: “Yes- with twins, can you believe it?” (returning his sarcasm)
So let’s just say that I am ok. I am still paranoid and will be until i get to see them next Wednesday on the screen moving around… and finally finding out their genders.

{END SCENE}

2. The double chin has returned.

Now, as I have stated before, I was overweight for most of my life. I had lost a significant amount over the past 4 years and was happy. I had asked my husband to take pictures of me (so that I can post it for all of you) and the results are not pretty. I have two chins, and let’s not discuss the thighs. I am large and in charge. I have not looked like this in years. It’s strange to see the old me staring back at me in new pictures. I cant quite explain it.

I was telling my husband how big my thighs and hips are getting and he answered “Well, they need to be big to hold up those babies”. Yes, that was his way of making me feel better.

I am NOT complaining. I knew of this weight gain before I started IVF. I expected it. The funny thing I am only 5 months pregnant! What will I look like in 2, 3 months?

So I am again a big girl, but it is for the best cause in the world. Of course it will be a bitch to take off again! Weight Wat.chers- here I come again! Did you miss me?

3. I hate people on the bus.
So the other day I get onto a crowded bus. There happen to have been one seat left in the front and although I don’t usually sit there (because they are reserved for the elderly and priority seating) I did.

After a few stops, an elderly man gets on the bus. He was wearing his black cataract sunglasses. I look around and notice that not ONE person offered him a seat. NOT ONE. This disgusted me to no end. I quickly got up and offered him my seat. He didn’t want to take it at first, because I am obviously pregnant but I insisted and told him I was getting off the bus soon.

Next stop, two elderly women get on. One little old white haired lady with a cane! You would think that someone would get up?
No. They didn’t.

The little old woman was hanging on for dear life to the bars. I wish I had a seat to give her. I wish I could say something to the big fat passengers that looked extremely healthy and NOT a priority that were sitting in the front. But what can I do?

I just don’t get people sometimes. I don’t. You know, although I am pregnant, I am still somewhat strong and can hold myself up. The elderly can not!

4. The white mom hairs are growing.
I found a few more white hairs today. That’s it- I am officially a mom. My kids will know me as fat and old.

Ok, I am tired now.

For your viewing pleasure (these are for you K) here are a few fat pg pics I took today. Now mind you, I left out the double chinned ones. A girl has got to honor herself!

I am not happy in this picture: I just saw the double chinned pictures a moment earlier.

Bye!

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10 things pictures of ugly bathroom

August 28, 2007 at 5:15 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

10 things that would surprise you to know about me… (maybe I have too much free time on my hands)

1. I know what it’s like to be held up at gunpoint…… by the police.

Story: As a freshman in college, I went out on a double date with my best friend and two guys. Now, this is where it gets interesting…. I was crazy about the guy that my best friend was on the date with (it was a blind date that I had set her up on) and did not care much for my date. You see, I only dated the guy to get to his best friend (which is weird then why I would set him up with my friend- yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking). Anyway, we are driving on the highway en route to a restaurant in my date’s car when he pulls out two toy guns (they belonged to his little brothers). The guns looked automatic I must say. We pull into our exit on the highway when we see a police checkpoint. It was night, so the policeman flashed the inside of our car with a flashlight. He waved us on when he saw that we were just some college kids.
As we’re driving down the street a police car cuts us off and barricaded us, police officers got out of the car pointing their guns at our car and screamed “Get out, with your hands up.” Yes, they actually say that.
We were in shock.
As we exited the vehicle, with our hands up, we were confused- what had we done?
We were then told to place our hands on the vehicle as we were patted down. All the while, my best friend is laughing up a storm. She thought it was funny.
Turns out, someone on the highway had called the police when they had saw the “automatic weapons” and described the car. Yes- that really happened. Anyway the police said we could be in trouble… yadad yada…. it started to rain, my hands were still on the car, my hair got frizzy, the boy I liked started hugging me and crying. Quite the memory.

2. My Ex- Uncle stuck his tongue in my ear.

Yes, this gem of a story happened as well. You see, he was married to my mother’s sister and they had divorced. I had known him as my uncle since I was two years old. He would play with me and my brother, take us to movies, buy us ice cream- he was the fun uncle. He never did anything weird to us (just so you know). So when him and my aunt got divorced when I was 19, me and my brother were not about to severe our relationship with him. He was the cool young uncle type. We adored him.
One day I hung out with my uncle at his place ( I was 19). We made some mixed drinks and I guess he got a little too drunk….. you know where this is going. He started acting strange and proceeded to stick his tongue in my ear.
I stood there in schock.

Was this really happening?

I pulled back in horror- he quickly realized what he had done and apologized to me. I left.
I had decided to never tell my aunt or any family members what had happened. I mean my aunt was still the mother of his children and they had a great relationship when it came to the kids.
I saw him three years later at a family event and he took me aside and apologized, saying that he always viewed me like a little sister and had a little too much to drink that night(I was dating my husband at the time and he too was at the event, and when my “uncle” took me aside my husband was watching him with hawk eyes). I was still weirded out by him. I guess that was not the respond he was hoping for.
When it came time to invite him to my wedding, I had to. I mean, it would have been weird to all my family if I hadn’t (considering they knew that we were once so close). So I did. He didn’t come. You know what his reason was to my brother? He said that he did not come to my wedding because the last time he saw me, I was a bitch to him. Yes, he said that.

3. Most celebrities that I have met are asses- yet I cant stop reading celeb trash.
I am about to burst some of your bubbles. The celebs that I have met that are known for their “sweetness” are in reality…. jerks.
Case #1: Al Ro.kr “America’s friendly weatherman”- not friendly. Met him. I was walking with a friend in New York a few years back when we see Al. She decides to walk past him and say hi. Nothing more. He looks her straight in the eye and says “NO autographs”. She stands there bewildered and answered ” I didn’t ask for one” and walked away.
Case# 2: Rach.el Ray: I work for a huge media company here in NYC. I was on my lunch break with a friend when we saw her. She seems so cool on TV, so my friend walks up to her. Rachel had NO Interest in saying hello. She is not friendly. Now, mind you- I never ever walk up to celebs. Most of my friends do, but I don’t think they are special and I would NEVER ask for an autograph- I mean why would I? They wipe there ass just like everyone else.
Case# 3: Rob.in Williams: Now, this didn’t happen to me, but it happened to a good friend of mine. She was 10, at the airport with her dad, when she saw Robin sitting in the airport lounge. She loved him and her father convinced her to walk up to him and get an autograph. She mustered up the courage and approached. Robin said no to the autographed and asked not to be bothered. He broke her heart, and my own when I heard this story.

This can go on and on. These guys are jerks.

But today one celeb redeemed himself: George Lopez. The man is the sweetest! I was picking up my lunch from delivery in my building downstairs when I saw him standing in the lobby waiting for someone. I never ever approach celebs- like I mentioned, but I was at his stand up show in Radio City a few months back and thought he did a great job. I walked up to him and apologized for bothering him and complimented the show. He was seriously the nicest! He wanted to shake my hand, and we discussed his comedy. He was very very genuine. They don’t come like that these days, I’ll tell you that much. It was a nice experience- but I probably would never do it again. He might have been extra nice because I was pregnant- since us pregnant women can get away with a lot of shit.

4. I think my husband’s ex put a curse on me.

I know that this is all speculation, but bare with me. My husband dated a girl on and off for two years prior to our relationship. Towards the end she expressed an interest in voodoo. She had been with a friend to a “voodoo doctor” and got hooked. Now, as the relationship between her and my husband was coming to a close, she told my sister-in-law that she had planted something in my husband’s backyard to make him love her. Yup.
It didn’t help, the relationship was over.
Fast forward, 3 months into my relationship with the hubs- he gets a call- from her! Now I would have let this go if a week prior she hadn’t been to our house and left a letter. In the letter she said that she had a dream about my husband’s mother (who had been dead since my husband was 10- which means she never met her) and came by to bring flowers to her grave site. I was steamed! My husband convinced me to ignore her. But then, a week to the day, she calls. I answer. She figures she got the wrong number. I inform her that she had the right number and that she should stop calling my boyfriend. She said that she had dialed his number “by accident”. I answer, “well, was the letter you left here last week an accident as well?”. She proceeds to inform me that was none of my business and hangs up.

Fast forward a few months later. I fell ill quite a few times. Now, considering that my husband lived in another country, our relationship was long distance for most of the time. But every time I would come visit him (for months at a time) something would go wrong with me. My first cyst developed while I was there, and so did my second. Every time I step foot into his home (which is also his family’s land) I do not get good vibes. I know she did something. I am not crazy. Now being away, I am ok.

5. I love oranges but hate anything orange-flavored.

6. I once found myself in a crack den with people OD’ing on the floor and the police at the door.
Now, mind you- I was a good girl. But you sometimes meet the wrong people in college. I ended up with a friend’s friend in a motel, hanging out- when all this went down. It freaked me out. I had never done one drug in my life- yet there I was, being questioned by the police. After answering their questions they looked at me and said that a girl like me did not belong there and I should go home. The problem was- I was stranded in Connecticut with no way to get home. That’s a whole other story.

7. I dont like my husband’s tiny old grandmother.
There is something evil about her. I feel guilty saying it, but he sees it as well.
8. I killed Orville Redenboker.
I may have mentioned this before. But I did. I was 15, and at midnight had a hankering for popcorn. As the popcorn was popping I looked at the jar with his smiling face. I thought to myself “I wonder if he’s dead yet”.

Fast forward: Next morning….. I was getting ready for school when I heard the news Orville Redenbacher had died around midnight the night before. He was in his hot tub, had a heart attack, and drowned.
“According to The New York Times, Redenbacher was found dead in a whirlpool bathtub in his condominium, having drowned after suffering a heart attack… ”
Now, I know I wasn’t there… but that scared the shit out of me. You know what scares me even more so? That they are now using his images on TV.
9. As a child I could not go to the bathroom if the shower curtain was not pulled back (revealing the tub).
This was because I had seen nightmare on elm street and was convinced that Freddy would reveal himself to me as I was peeing, from behind the curtain. I also had this fear about Michael Jackson.

10. And finally…..You know what? I cant think of anything good. I will get back to you.
Ok, so as promised I am posting pictures of my ugly ugly upcoming bathroom. Some of you may say that it’s not so bad. Pictures can be deceiving. I LOATHE it. The tiles I currently have are a nice cream/tan color that go with everything! My floor is white. My current bathroom looks fresh and natural. This one looks like a 50′s dinner threw up on it.
***By the way guys- this is the small bathroom you get for $1300 a month in NYC and surrounding area. Eat your heart out!***
Exhibit A : Notice how there is no room for a mirror on top of the sink? Isn’t that lovely?

Exhibit B- They decide to hang the mirror on the left wall. That makes a lot of sense.

Exhibit C: Don’t you just love the beautiful curtains the last people had up? WHAT WERE THINKING?

Exhibit D: The checkered floor. How I hate it. The super said he may be able to change the floor. At least I will have a bit of salvation.

And if you’re interested this is my almost 20 week belly….

Mind you I had just returned from work. I was tired and bloated. These are my old comfy pj’s. This is by no means a “Glamour Shot”

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August 24, 2007 at 2:01 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

I can eat grilled cheese sandwiches for days.
Seriously, my love for them has not wavered at all during this pregnancy. It is my comfort food. Before I leave for work in the morning I make one or two to tide me over on the long subway ride. I never get sick of them.

Anyway, I am getting to that point in my pregnancy when everything hurts. Everything. All the time. Even when I lay in bed I feel my achy limbs. My husband has not offered to give me a massage as of yet. Places hurt that I never knew could hurt! Is it strange that my pubic bones hurt (I know TMI)? The weight of these kids is finally getting to me.

And I would be so cool with that if I would feel them kicking me- but I haven’t yet! When will I feel their little feet hitting my insides? It really does worry me that I have not felt them yet. I know the doctor said I should start feeling them at the end of my 5th month or so… but with twins I expected to feel them earlier. Look at me, already worrying about my kids.

Sometimes when I walk down the street or sit on the subway, I wonder to myself if there are women looking at me and envying that I am pregnant (when they have fertility struggles). I wonder about these unknown women because I was them a few months ago. The summers were the worst because clothing is minimal so you tend to notice many pg women walking down the street. And every time you see one, it’s a slap in the face. You then question what is wrong with you and ask GD why you cant be one of those women. You curse life and think it unfair. And it is.

And now, I am the pregnant woman in the summertime. But although I am pregnant, I will ALWAYS be one of them. ALWAYS. I will always be a woman that has to have medical science intervene if she wants to get pregnant. And who knows if I will be lucky again in the future? It’s funny how people always ask a woman how many kids she plans to have. Isn’t it funny that it’s a choice for most women? It’s not for most of us. I sit back and tell people I would love 4 children, but in the back of my mind I know that truly, the number is up to GD.
Oh on a side note…. tell me I’m not the only one fearing that when these babies come out they will look nothing like my husband or I. I know there have been situations in the past that they have put the wrong eggs in or mixed the wrong sperm in fertility clinics. How crazy is that? I mean, once you remove mother nature from the equation- anything can happen. I have faith that my children will be mine and my husband’s but you cant truly know until they come out right? Please tell me these thoughts have crossed your minds as well.
Oh- and I called my doctor to see if I can take Mylanta for this heartburn and he suggested Zantac. Has anyone taken these and how well do they work?

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General issues

August 22, 2007 at 5:59 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

Some guy decided to cough in my face yesterday on the bus. How nice?

Wonder how long it will take for me to get sick. The countdown begins.
Ok, so lets talk about sex.
I was just made fun of by a few friends/co-workers at lunch yesterday. The last time we went out I was in my first trimester. They said that when my second rolls around, my hormones will kick in and make me sex-hungry. They asked if it had kicked in and I said no. The truth is, I’m just not that into it. I don’t know why, but I feel as though I can do without it for the next year. I am tired and big, and uncomfortable in my skin. I am just not in the mood. Of course this doesn’t bode well for the hubby, but I just feel so not myself, so out of it.
I’m wondering if you guys have been through this and what your take is on the matter.

Next up for discussion:

Do strangers really try to go up to your baby and touch them? This is new to me. A friend of mine told me yesterday that she took her son in his stroller to a local pharmacy. Her son was sleeping and she had the front part pulled down. The cashier left her counter and came around to where the stroller was, and pulled up the part that was down. My friend sort of backed away and told her that her son was sleeping. I mean do those things seriously happen? How strange is that? I would not have been that nice to the cashier. I would have said, “excuse me, what do you think you’re doing?”…

In other news, I have not been able to cross my legs in months. It’s not that I cant, it’s just that the weight of my crossed leg is just too much for the poor leg holding it up.

So I had a dream about a celeb yesterday. A celeb I am not even crazy about. It was a naughty dream. It involved John Mayer. In it, I was hanging out with him and he sang to me. I had butterflies in my tummy. Remember getting those? It’s beautiful to be married and all…. but don’t you sometimes wish you could have a first kiss again? To wonder if he likes you as well? To wonder if he’ll call you?

I believe I love my husband more today than I did before we got married. Right before our wedding we fought- a lot. We fought dirty. You know the fights I’m talking about. At that time I wondered to myself if I was making a mistake by marrying him. We would yell and he would say we should call off the wedding. I would say “no way- your not going to embarrass me. We will get married and if we choose to later, get divorced”. And I really believed it.

And today, we are stronger than ever (thank GD). You learn how to live with one another. To get along and not to step on each other’s toes. And we’ve both become better people.

Mothers….

I’ve been thinking a lot about my mother lately. Although I know she means well, the woman has made ALOT of mistakes raising my brother and I. She showed favoritism often, she would hit, and when we would fight she would use our insecurities against us (not great for a child) . I always got the brunt of her wrath. My brother (“her special little angel”) on the other hand, never did (although he has major issues). Now, for years I thought it was me, that I was the problem. My mother is loved by all and when we would fight everyone would wonder how I could fight with such a great woman. But by having my husband in the family now, he sees what I see. He sees that she puts on a front with everyone but her immediate family. That the monster in her comes out with us. So it’s nice to know that I am not crazy.

Being pregnant, and months away from being a mommy to not one- but two babies- has brought on worry. I am afraid that I will be like her. I am trying to relax about it – I’m thinking that if I am thinking so much into it, than that will already make me a better mom. Hopefully I will take the good that my mother has taught me, but leave the bad behind.

Oh- and by the way, what’s up with people placing their dogs in baby strollers? Are they crazy? I was just outside and a woman with a stroller walked by me. Of course, its natural to look at the stroller and want to see the baby. No baby this time- just a Yorkie. These people must be bored ( i hope no one that is reading this is offended).

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One Ugly Bathroom

August 21, 2007 at 1:28 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

The landlord called me back yesterday and the apt is now ours. He wont change the bathroom. That made me mad as hell. The bathroom is the only thing that is deterring me from being truly happy with the apt.

I was playing tug of war with myself last night.. to take the apt/ to not take the apt. My husband is worried about the finances, but I did the math and we can afford it… but we will be living tightly. And I also know that if we don’t do this now, we wont be moving in a very long time ( and I would prefer to have an extra room for the kids before their arrival).

While my husband slept on the couch I came to a realization… I can no longer be selfish. It’s not about me and what I want, or what is ideal for me. It’s about the kids. I want them to have a room, for them. I want them to play, and build forts, and have their own little space. Although they wont each have a room for a few years, at least they could have their own little corner in the world that is just theirs.

So yes, I will suck it up, deal with the smaller ugly tiled bathroom- for them. At the end of the day, they are all that matters.

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Apartment, Sleep, Etc

August 20, 2007 at 2:27 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

*** Nursery PICTURE IS NOT MINE. It’s the color I want for Nursery**

Some thoughts.

-I don’t sleep well. It was bound to happen at some point. I cant find a comfortable position at all. I don’t know if I need a new pillow or whatnot, but my sleep sucks. I am also boiling hot at night. I turn my AC down to 68 degrees f, and my poor husband shakes from the cold (although I tell him he wouldn’t if he put on some damn clothes). No matter how cold the room is I feel like there is an inferno inside. They say its because the baby’s temp is higher than your own. Now double that. Any advice on how to have a better night’s sleep?

- My underwear no longer fits. I am only 4.5 months along and have finally decided to buy maternity underwear. I purchased a larger bra and some other undergarments. Just thought I’d share.

- I think I found an apartment- yeahy! So it’s like this. I have been bugging my super to find me a two bedroom in my building for months. He claimed that there were no 2 bedrooms to rent, only to buy. I figured that meant that I would have to move away form my lovely building. We live in a great location, and no problems with neighbors. Yesterday as I was waiting for the elevator I ran into my super. He is an awesome guy (although we did slip him some money to get us our first apartment). He asked when I was due and if I knew what I was having. I said that I think I am having one of each- and he was in shock that I am having twins (even though I had mentioned it to him a few months ago when I originally asked him about a 2 bedroom). I went on to say that is why I need a bigger apt. He said he had one, that it can be rented, a two- bedroom, on the first floor (ideal when you have two little babies running around). I enthusiastically said “Take me there” and we proceeded to the apartment.
The apartment is pretty large- but to every apt there is good and bad:

Pros:
-2 large bedrooms right next to one other -so we can have a nursery- and also put a pull out couch in there so that we have space for company (we usually have a lot of family visit us from Israel).
-first floor
-same building
-large living room
-a lot more closet space
-can put a dishwasher in (since its the first floor)

Cons:
-The kitchen is smaller than what we currently have- which means less closet space in the actual kitchen (but we have more closets in the halls so we can store items there)
- Bathroom…. smaller, but the tiles is what kills it for me. They are ugly! The tiles in my apt are A LOT nicer. I asked the supper if they could change them and he was skeptical since he said they were just recently changed.
- Another $275 a month (if we’re lucky) it may be $325…

Yeah, if we take it we’ll be living very very tightly (financially). But no one said that having kids was cheap. My husband goes to school full time and works as well. When school is out for the summer and winter breaks he works full time which brings in a lot more income. So we could save during those times. We also just got the new car which is costing us an arm and a leg. So yeah, the timing is not ideal.. but at the end of the day these are TWO babies, not one. They need their space. I need my space. I want to tell them “go play in your room”.

I called the building management and left a message for the owner. He should be calling me back soon. Hopefully we can have the apt ( we have lived in his building for 2.5 years never late with rent, never had any problems). I mean the supper would know if the apt was promised to someone else. If we can have the apt, that means that we would either move in by the 30th of this month or 15th of September. It wont be so bad since he would probably give us keys to the vacant apt so that we could move our stuff in slowly over the course of the month.
I would also have to choose a paint color for our nursery. I was thinking a light greenish color would be best. Any ideas?

I will keep you posted. My life seems to be in a whirlwind lately.

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August 16, 2007 at 1:45 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

Some thoughts for the day…..

It’s interesting not to be hit on by men anymore. I no longer feel like a piece of meat. It feels good to not feel violated just walking down the street (That rhymes doesn’t it?).

I have been hit on since I was 13…. you know when the boobs kick in. Even when I was heavier I would get the hoots and hollers. But then when I lost weight…. they would not shut up- especially if I ever decided to wear a skirt (mind you I hardly ever wore a mini, I always wore the a line- knee length). My husband would tell me that he felt sorry for us women with all that unwanted attention that we receive. A few months ago I was hit on by a man- while grocery shopping with my mother! It was mortifying. My mother laughed and said that I should enjoy this time since as women age that happens less and less. Eh… I’m ok without it. It’s a nice break.

A co-worker of mine asked me how many months along I am. I laughed inside because this was the same guy that has wanted to ask me for a while but was too afraid (fearing that I had maybe just put on some weight). He said he was ready to ask because I am now obviously pregnant. I love the gays because they don’t hold back at all- he said that I had also gained weight in my ass, face, chest.. etc. Oh really? I hadn’t noticed.

So we went to get our new car yesterday. It’s pretty cool. We’ve never had a new car before. My husband drove it home because I was too afraid to. I know I will have to get over that fear soon, but I was in no mood yesterday.

I came home early yesterday so that me and dh could get all the car stuff done. He was in physical therapy for the accident when I arrived home. I reached for the keys in my purse, but realized that they were not there. Yup, I was locked outside my house. It was hot. I needed to pee. My husband had turned off his phone. My parents who live close by were not home. I proceeded to get on the bus and go to where my father had said the physical therapy center was and met my husband. I hung out with him for a while, then we went to get the car.

After that we went to the police station where the officer that took the car accident police report worked. We were there because the police report has wrong information that could be detrimental to our insurance and our law suit against the man that smashed into us (totalling our car). Of course the cops didn’t change the report (as my father had predicted, but hey we gave it a try). The NYPD are such an amazing group of people. They are so tough when you first talk to them because they are so used to confrontation and being disrespected. But when you are nice to them and thank them, that wall shatters and they are the sweetest bunch of people. I have such respect for these men and women its unbelievable.

Other than that, our past week has been a really long one. I am physically exhausted and wish I could sleep in for a few days. I don’t mind working, I just mind the getting up. I wish I could go to work on my own time. Don’t we all?
Oh, I jumped on K’s bandwagon and took the hel test. Turns out I only go to purgatory.
The Dante’s Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Level Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very High
Level 1 – Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Low
Level 2 (Lustful) Moderate
Level 3 (Gluttonous) Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Low
Level 6 – The City of Dis (Heretics) Very Low
Level 7 (Violent) Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) High
Level 9 – Cocytus (Treacherous) Low

Take the Dante’s” Inferno Hell Test

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New Car

August 14, 2007 at 6:13 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

I am so proud of my husband. He went to the car dealership all by himself today. This is unlike him. I am usually the one that deals with all our paperwork/ financial/ anything that has to do with forms and appointments…… you get the picture. But we really didn’t have a choice seeing as though we are car-less and we only have the rent- a- car until Friday. We are now “owners” of a Black Murano. I am finally a soccer mom… ok, not really, but you get the picture. I hope I get used to driving an SUV.
I guess I am getting myself prepared for my expanding family. I wish I could purchase baby items as well, but cant since it is considered taboo (in my background) to purchase things for a baby before it is born, I cannot do so. I will feel insanely unprepared when the time comes.
On another note, I thought I felt a kick yesterday afternoon but it was once and I am not too sure it was a kick. It sure felt like one. It didn’t hurt, because let’s face it: these babies aren’t that strong yet. But I haven’t felt it since so I doubt that it was a kick…. the doctor said that I should be feeling them in a month or so, that it is too early to feel them so who knows?
Most of my maternity pants are getting tight on me. I am sitting at my desk and wish I had a pair of sweatpants on. I am not working too much either since my boss is on vacation this week . I am contemplating leaving work early today. She wont really know since she will be on a plane. I just don’t see the point of sitting here with no work…..
Anyway, that is pretty much it. Not much to report…. Hope all is well with my fellow bloggers!

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August 13, 2007 at 2:13 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

I guess everything happens for a reason.

Just last week I was talking to my husband about possibly selling our car to lease a SUV (since we will be needing the room soon enough). Of course selling the car would be a long process, but I figured we don’t really have too much of a choice because a sedan wouldn’t be too convenient for us. Then out of the blue, our car gets totalled on Wednesday and this week we are getting a check for the entire value of the car (more so than what we payed for it!) . So not sure if that was a strong feeling of intuition or just good luck.

We went car shopping yesterday (not fun in this heat) and settled on the Nissan Murano. It’s an SUV, Not too big, but bigger than our last car. My husband is going to the dealership tomorrow to close the deal. And just in time! I’m pretty excited about it. I know its just a car but it symbolizes something so much more than that. It’s us starting our new life. We must accommodate our babies and our growing family.

I still have a hard time believing/ accepting that I am pregnant. It just seems unbelievable to me. Maybe even unnatural. I am halfway through my pg and still it astonishes me that I am carrying two little growing babies. I don’t know if that feeling will ever go away. Maybe it will sink in when I get to hold them in my arms (GD Willing). But until then, I am astonished with each passing day.
On Saturday I didn’t do too much. I slept in, and then my husband came home from work at about 3:30pm. He went to take a nap and I did as well. We awoke at 9pm and decided that we wanted breakfast food at a diner.. so we called my mom asked her to join us and off we went. I ordered choc chip banana pancakes. BIG MISTAKE. My stomach was hurting so bad the entire night…. banana’s and myself do not go well together.
On a side note- I got my results for the second half of my NT Screening and everything seems perfect.. THANK GD. I am on so many blogs with so many of my fellow ivf pregnant friends that have had many scares with the NT screening. That is why I prepared myself not to go crazy if I was told my results were off. Thank GD they were OK. Of course, nothing is guaranteed, but at least I can now rest easy until the next set of tests.

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Yesterday: The day from hell

August 9, 2007 at 2:41 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

Yesterday was no fun.

I awoke at 6am heard the severe rain and thunderstorms out my window and decided that I would go to work late (considering my boss is not on the east coast and would not be in the office for two weeks). I sent her an email stating that I would be an hour or two late for work and proceeded to bed. I awoke at 8:30am, got dressed and watched the news. Apparently, a tornado hit my city and the subways were not working. They warned whoever was still home to stay home. So, I did just that. I emailed my boss explaining the situation and worked from home (via blackberry).

My mother called and we began talking. The talking turned into an argument over my “precious” brother. She always tries to force a friendship/ relationship btwn us and it just does not work. We are too different and argue a lot. She tells me that I think that I am better than him and we proceed to fight .

Now mind you my brother is 30, unmarried, and lives at home with my parents. He dropped out of college his first semester (even though he was pulling all A’s) and took any job that came his way. He hardly helps with the bills, sits at home and wonders why his life is horrible and why he doesn’t have a girlfriend. He pity’s himself. I cant respect someone that sits back and wants things to happen without trying! He has once admitted that he is jealous of me. To him, I am his younger sister and I am living an “adult life”. I went to college, got my degree, got a job in my intended field, got married, and am starting a family. Does he think these things just happened without my working hard for them??? Come on!!!

I have worked hard for everything in my life. Everything. I didn’t finish my degree in the 4 years you are expected to. It took me 6 years. My relationship was hard! I had a long distance relationship with my husband for 2 years before he moved here- the hardest two years of my life! I didn’t got a job right away either. I searched for a year and took a job that payed me very minimally just to get into my company. From there, the hard work and dedication I showed got me the job I have today that pays me well (thank G-D). Any as for the family? We all know that wasn’t easy. So why would I “pity” someone who sits back and doesn’t try for anything and just complains? To him I am a “snob” that looks down upon him. That’s not the case….. I am disappointed in him because I know how intelligent he is and what he is capable of -if he only tried.

So as I was arguing with my mother about him, he overheard and started yelling at my mother asking her why she was talking about him. Then he leaves me a nasty voice message saying that I should not talk behind his back and that I am not better than him, and was cursing at me like a sailor! With all of his nasty words I am surprised he didn’t wish badly upon my children (which he has done in the past before I had gotten pg).

Yeah- and that was just the first part of the day!

My doctor’s appointment was scheduled for today at 6pm, but figuring I was home yesterday I changed my appointment for that day (wanted to be a good employee and not leave early today if I wasn’t in yesterday). I called the husband and told him to meet me at the doctor’s office. As I got into the cab, i get a call from DH stating that he would not make it to the doctor’s because our car was now totaled. Someone had rammed into him on the highway. Thank GD no one was hurt seriously, but my husband did have neck and shoulder pain. So that’s it ladies- no more car for us.

That’s not the sad part. A month and a half ago my husband was in another car accident (the other drivers fault again) and we had filed a claim. We had an appointment for this Friday to go get it fixed, but the new accident severely damaged the car and you cant see the original damage now. So.. I had to cancel the first claim (lucky bastard- the guy we hit us the first time- gets off Scott free)…

Now, I am hoping that its too expensive to fix and they cut us a check for the value of the car (because I was contemplating leasing a new car that would be a bit bigger for the impending children and their items). Anyway we’ll see what happens.

I went to the doctor sans husband and waited there forever. I finally go into the sono and the woman says that it is too early to detect the sexes- B.S! How is it that at 13 weeks at the NT screening sono, the doctor tried and said she pretty much could tell the sexes? So she said that we might be able to tell next time when I am 21 weeks (GD willing) when they do a level two ultrasound (whatever that means).

The doctor said everything is fine with the babies- yeahy! They both weigh 6oz and are measuring the same and on time. How exciting? I got to see my babies and I finally saw Baby A move (she is the lazy one who I never see move). I did get some pics but the kids look like aliens so I am scared to post them.
Oh and my weight gain…. drum roll please……………………………………………………………..
Pre- IVF until now…. 25 pounds. Yeah. I am packing them on!
Since my first appointment at my OBGYN (after I graduated from fertility clinic) I have gained 16 pounds. My OBGYN says that’s good bec I am averaging 1 pound a week. Little does he know that all together pre-ivf I have packed on 25. I stood there in silence as he praised my 1lb a week weight gain… ha!
So maybe I should cut back on the food? I mean, If I gain 60 pounds I wont cry. I will then be over 200 pounds of pure unadulterated mama, but my kids will be healthy. Most of the weight will come off and I will have to work on the rest (which I am accustomed to anyway)…. I am focusing on the babies and trying to not stress about the gain. I will deal with it later. Plus, maybe I will breastfeed until the kids are in college? I hear you burn 500 cals a day doing that… times that by two- and walla! :)

Anyway, I get home at 7:30, followed by more poor husband who had had a rough day, and we proceed to go to the ER to get him checked. We were there until 12am! What kind of ER is that? Someone can die waiting in a waiting room (it happened a few months ago actually).

So all in all….. great day let me tell you. Can you sense my sarcasm?

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